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What To Drink On The First Date

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You finally got her to accept the terms of the date. You are meeting her at a bar, what should you drink? What you drink, where you drink, and how much you drink can be sending the wrong signals. You can go from charming to douchebag in no time.

“A few years ago, a guy took me out for sushi on a first date; I hadn’t realized it was a BYOB restaurant until he met me at the door with two wine bottles in tow. Now, grammar is admittedly my strong suit over math, but even I knew that added up to each of us finishing our own bottle” said Brooke Sagger “Here’s how that looked to me: that he was trying to get me really, really drunk. For one, I didn’t know him! He could’ve been a serial brunette strangler for all I knew! (I watch a lot of Law & Order.) It also made me feel like he assumed I wouldn’t be interesting enough sober”

Date number 2 could hinge on your understanding of her and what you drink. So before you start ordering drinks, check out our guide to drinking on the first date.

Know Your Limit

Before you order one drink, you should know your limit and your liquors. You are not there to get drunk and shit faced. Rule of thumb, you should have two drink max. You are not there to impress her with how many drinks you can put back. You are there to get know each other and you can’t do that shit faced.

Find A Unique Place

Take your date to your usual hangout. It’s cool if you know the bartender where you do end up going — in fact, it may be a plus to have an ally behind the bar — but you don’t want to walk in and have everyone there shout, “NORM!” It’s difficult to have an intimate conversation with a new friend when all the barflies you know are coming up and reminding you of that crazy time you got wasted and did a striptease during karaoke — last Wednesday. That place is yours and yours alone, and should stay that way until you get to know your date better.

Be True To Your Budget

Avoid the massive trap of ordering something that you can’t afford and gives her a false since of your lifestyle. avoid going straight to the top shelf or calling for a bottle of vintage champagne-unless that’s an everyday affair for you. It can make you look needlessly showy and could also make your date a little uncomfortable that you might a) be expecting something in return or b) going to suggest splitting the whopping bill.

Neither should you be cheap – be yourself, be generous, but don’t be needlessly decadent.

Order a Manly Drink

Skip the drinks fluorescence neon colored drinks with the umbrellas. Man up, there are plenty of drinks on any bar menu that will give her the right impression of you.

Try your hand at ordering a Negroni a classic with a twist made up of gin, campari, and sweet vermouth. Or try some Scotch on the rocks with some soda. “Many men fail with ordering drinks on the first date cause they want to impress the girl by ordering them a drink without a chaser” says drink expert Chris Louis “This is just an easy way to get embarrassed if you don’t know your limit.”

Also Scotch and smoky whisky without a chaser can give you some terrible breath that will turn her off.

Women

Things Men Do In Bed That Every Woman Hates

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Most men are overly confident when it comes to our bedroom prowess. You walk away feeling like King Kong, Thor, and Hercules don’t have shit on me mentality is often a huge turnoff.  The bedroom is the last place you want to have selective hearing and to be selfish. That’s right selfish. There are few common mistakes and pitfalls that most men make.

Before you lose out maybe you should read what women have to say about what they hate that men do in behind closed doors.

Undressing before you are sure where the evening is headed.

It is awkward if you are standing there half naked and she is wondering why.

Have bad hygiene!

It is a non-starter if you haven’t showered or shaved in days. Come on men, we like women to be clean and smell good, they would appreciate the same from us.

No foreplay.

Women like foreplay before getting to the endgame. Spend some time with it because unlike us, most women take more time to get ready. Beware, don’t finish before she is halfway there.

Ignoring everything except the big three.

Don’t just focus on between her legs, lips and her chest. Women do enjoy some exploration. Let you hands wander, and she may do the same to you.

Hair pulling or biting.

Don’t assume women want to have their hair yanked or their nipple bit. Just because you saw it in a porno movie does not make it true. You should talk to her about the level of roughness that is acceptable to her.

Surprising foreign objects.

Use your imagination and then don’t go there. Unless asked specifically, do not surprise her with a makeshift dildo. Or even the real thing.

Obnoxious music.

Techno beats or heavy metal is not the usual mood maker men think for women.

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Women

Winning The Fight With Her

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By nature, most men are not the pacifist and feelings are something to buried unless it is angry. We want to grab shields like Spartan’s and conquer thinking that every battle is the War of Worlds. But this tactic when dealing with your girlfriend can have you sleeping at a friend’s house or alone trolling for another girlfriend.

So to save your self-lonely nights of holding pillows for comfort try some of these types to win a battle without losing the war with her.

Before you go further, one code every man should live by doesn’t hit a woman. If the situation is getting to the point that you can’t talk, walk away. If you decide to stay and talk it out using the rules below.

1. Find Hidden Meaning

Think for a moment about what sets you off. Is there something she says and does—or doesn’t do—that makes you angry or, even worse, resentful? There’s nothing wrong with anger, but if you can figure out the “why” of what grinds your gears, you may be able to find a way to grease them so your engine doesn’t seize up. In the same vein, a circuit can only take so much current before it blows. To diminish possibly irreparable damage to your relationship, find a way to cut the juice to the offending trigger before you blow a fuse.

Ultimately, a great deal of anger response is learned behavior. You can’t control or change another person’s behavior; you can only change yours. Sometimes if you can get to the root of why something gets to you so much, you can let go of it. But depending on the severity of what’s upsetting you, it might not be that simple, and could become a deal-breaker.

2. Avoid “You” Out Of It

According to Veronica Monet, ACS, CAM, couples’ consultant, author of Where Sex and Spirit Come Together ,  many couples get into trouble by trying to “correct” their partner’s behavior. Conversations that begin with phrases such as: “You always…” or “You never…” or “I don’t like it when you…” can lead to hot water.

“The use of the word ‘you’ can be very triggering for most people,” Monet explains, “because it’s so often associated with criticism. A more successful strategy is to begin your sentences with the word ‘I.’ For instance, by saying, ‘I am unhappy,’ you can create a connection which will make them feel safer and less defensive.” She continues, “By taking responsibility for your feelings, your partner is enabled to show compassion … If something serious is at play and needs to be addressed, at least you’ll be in a much more stable position to discuss issues and find solutions to them as a team.”

3. Fight about what you’re fighting about.

If your girlfriend has said/done/not done something that’s triggered your anger response, that’s what you should be fighting about. If instead of facing the issue, you drag a lot of irrelevant crap into the mix, she’s not going to know what you’re going off about and you’re not going to get it resolved. You might be tempted to criticize her for something she’s wearing just because you’re already angry at her about something larger. Resist the urge. All that accomplishes is diminishing your argument about the larger issue by making you seem irrational.

4. Leave Your Friends’ Opinions Out of It

Every woman’s greatest fear in life, aside from dating an ax murderer and the possibility that her daily non-fat latte actually contains lard, is getting stuck with the “crazy” label. So even if all of your buddies think that she’s being totally ridiculous for expecting you to do something like text her while you’re hanging out with them, she doesn’t need to know they think she’s nuts. A) They’re your friends, so of course, they’re going to have your back. B) Telling her will only make her feel awkward around the friends you name the next time she sees them. And C) It’s guaranteed to drag your argument into overtime — and that severely damages your chances of coming out on top.

5. Don’t Make Empty Threats

The United States of America does not respond kindly to threats, and neither does your girlfriend. So if you give her an ultimatum — “Unfriend your ex and quit following him on Twitter or we’re so done” —  you better be prepared to follow through. Women are nasty mental ninjas who will call your bluff, which will either force you to follow through and leave or back down with your balls in hand.

 

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Women

Harvard Professor Thinks Sex Robots Will Make Men Obesolete

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The quest to build new tech sometimes is less about creating civilization and more about getting off. Sexbots has some countries worried and banning the dolls for fear of the impact it could have on human relationships.  The market is currently 95 percent male dominated but that could all be about to change.

“I think it’s the men who should be worried. It’s entirely possible that robots can outperform them” said Dr. Cathy O’Neil who has a Ph.D. in mathematics from Harvard University in a recent Bloombergarticle

Dr. O’Neil went on to say that it wouldn’t be such a bad thing with the exception of killer robots.

“Would that be such a bad thing? In the #MeToo age, I feel like raising standards is quite reasonable. It’s called for, in fact. Make the men compete. It’s the dating equivalent of having free state colleges lower tuition rates everywhere.” says O’Neil, “Granted, there could be dangers. There is, for example, the possibility that hackers could turn sex robots into killers.”

Is it possible we won’t want to interact with humans anymore purely because it’s easier to deal with a robot? Another way to simplify life by avoiding the pitfalls of intimacy and challenges of relationship?

But even O’Neil wouldn’t forgo humans. “Don’t get me wrong, I have a good husband. I doubt I would trade in.”

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