Connect with us

Women

How Not To Blow It In Bed

Published

on

Studies show that most men think about sex every 30 seconds. In that 30 seconds, the focus is squarely on the end the result. The focal point is rarely on her or what happens in the moment. This can lead to disaster. Lucky for you that we put together a list of some pitfalls you might want to avoid if you want a second round.

So read on and make sure that you aren’t turning your woman off without even realizing it.

 Set The Scene

Any good coach will tell you if you made it to the championship act like you been here before. There is no guarantee you are going to make it back, so you should be prepared at all times.I realize that you aren’t necessarily a set designer, but seducing your woman will be a heck of a lot easier if your pad provides her with a comfortable and inviting atmosphere. That means no dirty laundry or empty pizza boxes on the floor, and no strange house guests on your couch.

So, tidy up a bit, dim the lights, put on some nice mood music, and pour her a glass of wine. Just make sure not to go overboard and turn your place into a Bond-like sex haven, with curtains that close with a remote, strategically angled lighting, and a mini-bar complete with ice machine built into the wall, or she will bolt before you can offer her a martini.

Pay Attention  (whether verbal or physical) To Her

“Most women complain that men don’t listen and it translates into the bedroom as well,” says Nelkin. “Perhaps it stems from the male ego, which tells them, ‘I know it already’ or ‘I know it better than she does.'”

It is up to you to pay attention to her telltale signs until she is comfortable enough with you to really open up verbally. So don’t treat her like a blow-up doll and have your way with her (unless, of course, she has specifically asked you to do so).

Try to notice how she responds to your touch and react accordingly. If you sense that she is tensing up when you touch her or try to move her body in a certain way, it could be that you are being too rough or that she is ticklish, so be more gentle. If on the other hand, she seems completely unaffected by your caresses, it’s time to turn up the volume and shake things up a bit.

Kiss Her Zones

“Not warming up the engine properly before putting the foot on the accelerator,” says Nelkin. In other words — foreplay, foreplay, foreplay! “Insufficient foreplay can undermine the entire act of sex,” she says. “We women need it more than you guys do!”

The fact that you’re probably fascinated with a nice pair of knockers practically ensures that you will rarely forget to fondle a woman’s breasts during sex. Unfortunately, it is easy to forget that a woman’s body is full of less obvious erogenous zones.

Next time you’re in bed with your woman, try kissing her collarbone, where her shoulder meets her neck, gently running your fingers along her back, caressing and kissing her hips, or teasing the soles of her feet. Doing so will surely give her goosebumps and drive her crazy, and she will undoubtedly want to please you in return.

Don’t Be A Director

Once again, she is not blow up doll. While communicating your preferences is important, so is going with the flow and doing what feels right. So, don’t bark out orders like a drill sergeant and expect her to comply without question. Sex is supposed to be fun and free, not unpleasant and stressful.

Rather than being clinical with directions, try soft-spoken requests, communicating your desires with your eyes (for romantics only), or gently moving her body into the appropriately accommodating position and seeing her reaction. Such approaches will yield much more favorable results than the commando approach.

Don’t Assume She’s Satisfied

Just because you got off, that doesn’t mean that she’s satisfied. Remember that there is another person there with you who would also like to bask in that afterglow. At least make an effort to please her.

Look at it this way: If she is just as satisfied as you, she will likely be too spent for “pillow talk” and want to take a nap with you. So, get to it. Being selfish with sex is sure fired why to end a relationship.

Finally-Don’t Bail

While wanting to hit the hay after great sex is perfectly understandable, and often the natural thing to do, taking off on a woman after having sex with her is among the most rotten things a guy can do. Not only do you look like a jerk, but just think about how she’s left feeling.

If you can’t stand a woman enough to spend the night with her and not bail on her before sunrise, then you’ll have to deal with the aftermath (she’ll tell all her friends). At least spend 30 minutes talking to her before you split. Or, you can always opt to sleep with a chick you could bear looking at after you ejaculate.

This was originally published on GalTime, from our female friends who occasionally give us some much-needed tips. In this case, we hope they’re wrong (see first sentence and try to contain your groan).

Women

Top 3 Signs To Know She’s Not Into You

Published

on

The promises of instant connections and happily ever after are everywhere. You are constantly reminded by ads for dating sites. Or scrolling past all of the damn couple pics on your social media timeline. So, you decide to go on few dates simply to the person that is meant for you. You go on couple dates, some are flat out awful and others are not too bad.

You managed to find one woman that is amazing. She is everything you wanted to find. She’s funny, smart, beautiful, and into everything that your into. It’s just one problem, she just wants to be friends. Somehow that get’s interrupted as if we hang out long enough she will eventually see what you see.

Wrong. Dealing with rejection against our own expectations can be soul crushing. You should take the situation for what it is. She may have given you some clues that this was coming before, but you choose to ignore them. But here are some signs that you want to keep your eye on for next time.

She Keeps Reinforcing That You’re Just Friends

Another way a woman might signal that she’s not interested in dating you is by reinforcing that the relationship is strictly platonic. If she’s constantly stressing that it’s so nice “having you as a friend” or explicitly introducing you as “my friend, [your name],” then she’s trying to tell you something — namely, that you are not her boyfriend and never will be.

Although this can sting, be careful about how you respond to it. It’s important that you don’t throw a tantrum about being put in the “friend zone”: Friendship is, after all, a precious gift, and you should be grateful that she’s offering you that much. Insisting that she owes you anything more than friendship is pure entitlement, and may land you with no relationship with her at all.

If you don’t think you can handle just being friends with your crush, then you should make a clean break instead of lingering in the background, hoping she’ll change her mind. This will only lead to resentment when she eventually moves on to another relationship, so either graciously accept the friendship, or move on entirely.

She Hasn’t Introduced You To Anyone In Her World

If you and your crush have been “dating” (at least, in your eyes) for weeks or months, but she’s weirdly evasive about letting you meet anyone in her world, she’s probably not quite as committed to the relationship as you are. Introducing a partner to your friends and family is one of the most solid signs of commitment, and if she’s being evasive in this area, it probably means she doesn’t see you as part of her future.

“I’ve only ever introduced two boyfriends to my parents, so for me, it’s a huge step,” said Lily, 29. “As soon as I knew I was serious about someone, though, it’s something that would need to happen.”

A reluctance to introduce you to friends and family is probably not a fatal sign very early in a relationship, but if you’ve been going steady for a while and it’s not even on the cards — or if she’s reluctant to meet your friends and family — it’s not a good sign. If your worlds aren’t meshing at all, and she’s the one preventing it, then it’s probably time to look for a more committed partner elsewhere.

She Never Initiates Meetings Between You Two

If your crush is never the one to initiate plans between the two of you, this is a sign that she might not be as invested in the relationship as you are. Think about it: if she was really into you, you’d be one of her go-to people whenever she wanted to visit a gallery or check out a new movie, like she is for you.
This one often goes in tandem with another sign on this list: constantly flaking on plans. “I think a big indicator for me is if we’re trying to set up another date and they’re busy, but they also don’t suggest another time,” David, 29, said. If she’s flaking on you, failing to initiate plans, or the dreaded combo of both, it should be pretty clear that things aren’t going well.

You deserve better than a partner who is tepid and unenthusiastic about spending time with you, so cut things off if she’s never initiating plans. It will save her having an awkward conversation with you later about how she likes you, but just not like that.

She Tells You, Directly And In Words, That She’s Not Interested

This one is about as straightforward as it gets: if she’s told you, in words, that she’s not interested in you, then you don’t need to keep analyzing her behavior or look for signs that maybe she didn’t mean what she said.

Plenty of women AskMen spoke to were happy to make themselves completely clear about not being interested in a guy. “I tell him, ‘There’s no spark,'” explained Mary, 35. “I usually get, ‘Fair enough’, or no response at all to that; i.e. they can’t argue with it.” Kerri, 31, uses an even more unambiguous approach: “Usually after a date, if it is not obvious to him that there is no connection, I block him on my cell phone after telling him, ‘Thanks, but no thanks.'”

Clear rejection like this is a horrible feeling, but there is a silver lining. You don’t need to waste your time trying to mind-read now: she’s let you know straightforwardly that she’s not interested, so you can move on to someone whose feelings are reciprocal this time.

VIA: Askmen.com

Continue Reading

Women

5 Bad Habits That Ruin Dates

Published

on

You went on the first date and she didn’t respond to your messages. Maybe it’s problem with her, that she couldn’t see how great of a person are. Or maybe, just maybe, you have a problem. Unfortunately, some people don’t even know they have a problem and an even greater number of people don’t realize the possible outcomes associated with continuing these bad habits.

We have some of the top five bad habits men have on dates. Hopefully addressing these will help increase the odds for you to get a second date.

You Show Up Late

Punctuality is not the be-all and end-all of a good man. However, if you’re late all the time you’re certainly not winning any popularity contests with your main girl and this is surely a habit women hate. All emergencies aside, lateness indicates a lack of commitment to the plans you’ve made with one another. It also — whether intended or not — communicates a lack of respect and understanding for your date.

Staying Glued To Your Phone

It’s okay to have a busy social life that involves a lot of friends. It’s also okay to have a busy career that sometimes spills over into your free time. However, there is no reason that a man should be texting at the table. It’s extremely rude and it makes things really awkward. There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to eat and all the while this guy is clicking away at his phone. Men, keep your phone away until the date is over.

This goes along with texting, but there is no need to take a picture of yourself while on a date so that you can inform all of your Instagram friends. There’s also no need for you to chat on Facebook or update your status to keep all of your boys in the know of what’s going on. We also aren’t interested in seeing your friend’s dog or your camping trip from last summer.

Staring At Other Women

Women aren’t stupid. She knows you’re looking at women all the time. She knows you noticed the waitress, the bartender, and the girl at the next table. What she doesn’t want is for you to embarrass her or undermine her own looks by making a scene of it. She doesn’t want to notice that you’re noticing. If you’re gawking at other women, commenting on them as you pass or missing conversations with your own date because you’re so distracted, then you’re not giving your girl the respect and admiration she deserves, and she knows it.

Women have this thing with comparing themselves to other women, and it’s a zero-sum game. If you’re complimenting another girl’s ass, your date will assume that you mean it’s better than hers. This will make her feel less and less attractive with each comment until she wishes she’d just stayed home — and maybe next time she will.

Talking About Sex

You should avoid talking about sex on the first couple of dates. Yes, women like a confident man, but there is a time and place to have a conversation about sex. Most women are put off by men bringing it up in the conversation in the wrong setting.

Not only does it make the overall conversation and environment awkward, it also reflects on him poorly. When a guy talks about sex and other physical things, he is probably only interested in exactly that. After a few dates and some time spent getting closer and more comfortable, this sort of topic is all right. But on the first or second date? Goodness no! This may be on the top of the list of annoying things men do on dates.

Drinking Too Much

Just like a drunk woman, there is nothing less attractive than a man who can’t hold his alcohol or a man who doesn’t know when to stop. Having a few drinks on the first date is fine, in fact, this can be really helpful in making the two of you a lot less nervous and anxious. However, there is a certain point that you reach when you know enough is enough. A drunk man is annoying as can be.

Continue Reading

Women

Stress Is Ruining Your Relationship

Published

on

Everyone feels stress on a daily basis. EVERYONE. Rather is internal or external. From the daily grind of work, bills, deadlines, to an unbalanced relationship. Stress is often the key source to ruining relationships. It has a toxic effect that often times takes the form of blame, impacts intimacy, or worst.

“Stress is an emotional and physiological response to thinking that an event, condition, or situation is [terrible] and that no good can come from [it],” says Dr. Mantell. The trick is to adopt more positive frameworks for difficult situations. Try to remind yourself that you’ll get through it, that there may even be a good reason a certain stressor has occurred—and at worst, it’s only one bad event.

The good news is if you can see signs, you can improve your relationship.

#1. Your Irritable 

If you perceive everything your partner says as a slight or get miffed extra easily, stress may be a factor. The longer stress lasts, the more likely we are to feel grumpy or argumentative and lash out.

Give yourself time to acknowledge the root cause of your stress and frustration. Avoid the immediate outburst. Prioritize and make a commitment to resolve the issues. For example, if it is stress from work, make a rule to limit the conversations about work at home.

#2 She Can Be The Victim Not Problem

When we’re chronically stressed, we’re more likely to perceive even the best relationship in a negative light. We’re also unlikely to realize that stress is factoring into that perception. Placing the blame solely on her is draining and simply unfair. Sometimes he or she will be too overworked to help you as effectively as you’d like, and vice versa.

If you really care about her ask for help. Don’t try to solve every damn problem in one day. Set goals together on what you both want to accomplish.

#3 Not Enough Time

If you can devote hours of your day watching videos and working for some company. Then you gave yourself time. Time is the biggest causes of stress in the relationship. She wants more, you want more time. You want to do what you want and she wants to do something else.

Compromise for mutual time and be in the moment. That doesn’t mean go out with her and stay on your phone. Be in the moment. Schedule time to relax together and set rules that are acceptable to both parties.

Continue Reading

Popular

Copyright © 2017 Clutch Media Group.