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6 Steps to Get Out of the Friend Zone (And Not Feel Like a Complete Idiot)



get out of friend zone how to

Getting out of the scary and frustrating friend zone is no easy task, especially if you’ve been hanging out with this girl for a while.

While you two obviously enjoy talking to one another, laugh together and spend time (but nothing romantic), something just blocks her from seeing a potential boyfriend in you.

(So you end up cock-blocking every dude that attempts to make a move on her).

Escaping the friend zone like a pro

We’ve all been there and we’ve all heard the killer-of-a-man’s-dignity phrase, “Let’s just be friends,” basically telling you to back off because you are not mature/interesting/manly/strong/tall/or-whatever-the-f*ck-is-the-reason enough.

Or you sooo didn’t impress her as a male that she may have even said, “you’re such a good friend,” implying that she isn’t interested in cuddling or holding hands with you (and other romantic BS), let alone exchanging bodily fluids with you.

And you stand there, thinking to yourself, “Well, okay… we’ll just be friends then.” Because the fear of rejection is just too strong; and the fear of losing this cute girl prevents you from telling her straight-forward, “No, silly. You ARE my girlfriend.”

After all, this is no movie and you are no Ryan Gosling (but how cool would it be to say this phrase, take her face into your hands, press her body against the wall and kiss her lips passionately, right?). Though she would definitely be your girlfriend after something like that!

But I hear you, my friend (cough) man. No guy wants to make a fool of himself, and no guy wants to F-up miserably in front of their crush.

So how do you get out of the friend zone if you’re not Gosling and your life isn’t a two-hour chick flick? (particularly when telling her straight-forward that you like her feels scarier than punching Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson).

6-step strategy to get out of the friend zone

Analyze your game. Think about what mistakes you made in the beginning that landed you in this so uncomfortable and annoying friend zone. What is it that you may be missing in your communication with her (as a friend, for now) that could make her come to her senses and finally see a male in you if you had it?

Become the man she would want to wrap her legs around. If you’ve been friends for a while, you probably know her better than anyone else. What is she looking for in a man? Be that man for her.

Be boyfriend material-ish. While you’ve probably been told “just be yourself” BS numerous times, stop. What if this is the main culprit that is killing your chances with this girl? Guys who play the “just be yourself” card are usually way too friendly and nice with women. Get off that “white knight syndrome” horse and become a confident, classy and badass man.

Spend less time with her. That’s right, less. You see, friends tend to spend waaay too much time together (they chat, text, talk on the phone, Skype, share memes, Instagram stories, etc.) – up to the point that they never get the chance to actually miss one another. There’s just a lot of you in her life. Believe it or not, giving her less attention could help you win her over. After all, women do find uninterested / hard-to-get guys sexy for some reason…

Be bold. Okay, be prepared to roll out that inner Ryan Gosling in you (you do have it in you, ‘cause you’re awesome!). No more friendly hugs and high fives. Think: intimate, prolonged hugs, lingering touches, holding her hand, touching her face… You get the idea.

Say it! At this point she has had enough time to notice and evaluate your boyfriend properties (and you’ve given her plenty, TBH!), so you’re safe to finally profess your feelings and intentions. In fact, you may get out of the friend zone way before this step (see previous step “be bold,” the ultimate friend zone-killer).

Now that she’s yours, I told you had that Ryan Gosling in you, bro.

[Featured Image by StockSnap/Pixabay]


Top 3 Signs To Know She’s Not Into You



The promises of instant connections and happily ever after are everywhere. You are constantly reminded by ads for dating sites. Or scrolling past all of the damn couple pics on your social media timeline. So, you decide to go on few dates simply to the person that is meant for you. You go on couple dates, some are flat out awful and others are not too bad.

You managed to find one woman that is amazing. She is everything you wanted to find. She’s funny, smart, beautiful, and into everything that your into. It’s just one problem, she just wants to be friends. Somehow that get’s interrupted as if we hang out long enough she will eventually see what you see.

Wrong. Dealing with rejection against our own expectations can be soul crushing. You should take the situation for what it is. She may have given you some clues that this was coming before, but you choose to ignore them. But here are some signs that you want to keep your eye on for next time.

She Keeps Reinforcing That You’re Just Friends

Another way a woman might signal that she’s not interested in dating you is by reinforcing that the relationship is strictly platonic. If she’s constantly stressing that it’s so nice “having you as a friend” or explicitly introducing you as “my friend, [your name],” then she’s trying to tell you something — namely, that you are not her boyfriend and never will be.

Although this can sting, be careful about how you respond to it. It’s important that you don’t throw a tantrum about being put in the “friend zone”: Friendship is, after all, a precious gift, and you should be grateful that she’s offering you that much. Insisting that she owes you anything more than friendship is pure entitlement, and may land you with no relationship with her at all.

If you don’t think you can handle just being friends with your crush, then you should make a clean break instead of lingering in the background, hoping she’ll change her mind. This will only lead to resentment when she eventually moves on to another relationship, so either graciously accept the friendship, or move on entirely.

She Hasn’t Introduced You To Anyone In Her World

If you and your crush have been “dating” (at least, in your eyes) for weeks or months, but she’s weirdly evasive about letting you meet anyone in her world, she’s probably not quite as committed to the relationship as you are. Introducing a partner to your friends and family is one of the most solid signs of commitment, and if she’s being evasive in this area, it probably means she doesn’t see you as part of her future.

“I’ve only ever introduced two boyfriends to my parents, so for me, it’s a huge step,” said Lily, 29. “As soon as I knew I was serious about someone, though, it’s something that would need to happen.”

A reluctance to introduce you to friends and family is probably not a fatal sign very early in a relationship, but if you’ve been going steady for a while and it’s not even on the cards — or if she’s reluctant to meet your friends and family — it’s not a good sign. If your worlds aren’t meshing at all, and she’s the one preventing it, then it’s probably time to look for a more committed partner elsewhere.

She Never Initiates Meetings Between You Two

If your crush is never the one to initiate plans between the two of you, this is a sign that she might not be as invested in the relationship as you are. Think about it: if she was really into you, you’d be one of her go-to people whenever she wanted to visit a gallery or check out a new movie, like she is for you.
This one often goes in tandem with another sign on this list: constantly flaking on plans. “I think a big indicator for me is if we’re trying to set up another date and they’re busy, but they also don’t suggest another time,” David, 29, said. If she’s flaking on you, failing to initiate plans, or the dreaded combo of both, it should be pretty clear that things aren’t going well.

You deserve better than a partner who is tepid and unenthusiastic about spending time with you, so cut things off if she’s never initiating plans. It will save her having an awkward conversation with you later about how she likes you, but just not like that.

She Tells You, Directly And In Words, That She’s Not Interested

This one is about as straightforward as it gets: if she’s told you, in words, that she’s not interested in you, then you don’t need to keep analyzing her behavior or look for signs that maybe she didn’t mean what she said.

Plenty of women AskMen spoke to were happy to make themselves completely clear about not being interested in a guy. “I tell him, ‘There’s no spark,'” explained Mary, 35. “I usually get, ‘Fair enough’, or no response at all to that; i.e. they can’t argue with it.” Kerri, 31, uses an even more unambiguous approach: “Usually after a date, if it is not obvious to him that there is no connection, I block him on my cell phone after telling him, ‘Thanks, but no thanks.'”

Clear rejection like this is a horrible feeling, but there is a silver lining. You don’t need to waste your time trying to mind-read now: she’s let you know straightforwardly that she’s not interested, so you can move on to someone whose feelings are reciprocal this time.


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5 Bad Habits That Ruin Dates



You went on the first date and she didn’t respond to your messages. Maybe it’s problem with her, that she couldn’t see how great of a person are. Or maybe, just maybe, you have a problem. Unfortunately, some people don’t even know they have a problem and an even greater number of people don’t realize the possible outcomes associated with continuing these bad habits.

We have some of the top five bad habits men have on dates. Hopefully addressing these will help increase the odds for you to get a second date.

You Show Up Late

Punctuality is not the be-all and end-all of a good man. However, if you’re late all the time you’re certainly not winning any popularity contests with your main girl and this is surely a habit women hate. All emergencies aside, lateness indicates a lack of commitment to the plans you’ve made with one another. It also — whether intended or not — communicates a lack of respect and understanding for your date.

Staying Glued To Your Phone

It’s okay to have a busy social life that involves a lot of friends. It’s also okay to have a busy career that sometimes spills over into your free time. However, there is no reason that a man should be texting at the table. It’s extremely rude and it makes things really awkward. There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to eat and all the while this guy is clicking away at his phone. Men, keep your phone away until the date is over.

This goes along with texting, but there is no need to take a picture of yourself while on a date so that you can inform all of your Instagram friends. There’s also no need for you to chat on Facebook or update your status to keep all of your boys in the know of what’s going on. We also aren’t interested in seeing your friend’s dog or your camping trip from last summer.

Staring At Other Women

Women aren’t stupid. She knows you’re looking at women all the time. She knows you noticed the waitress, the bartender, and the girl at the next table. What she doesn’t want is for you to embarrass her or undermine her own looks by making a scene of it. She doesn’t want to notice that you’re noticing. If you’re gawking at other women, commenting on them as you pass or missing conversations with your own date because you’re so distracted, then you’re not giving your girl the respect and admiration she deserves, and she knows it.

Women have this thing with comparing themselves to other women, and it’s a zero-sum game. If you’re complimenting another girl’s ass, your date will assume that you mean it’s better than hers. This will make her feel less and less attractive with each comment until she wishes she’d just stayed home — and maybe next time she will.

Talking About Sex

You should avoid talking about sex on the first couple of dates. Yes, women like a confident man, but there is a time and place to have a conversation about sex. Most women are put off by men bringing it up in the conversation in the wrong setting.

Not only does it make the overall conversation and environment awkward, it also reflects on him poorly. When a guy talks about sex and other physical things, he is probably only interested in exactly that. After a few dates and some time spent getting closer and more comfortable, this sort of topic is all right. But on the first or second date? Goodness no! This may be on the top of the list of annoying things men do on dates.

Drinking Too Much

Just like a drunk woman, there is nothing less attractive than a man who can’t hold his alcohol or a man who doesn’t know when to stop. Having a few drinks on the first date is fine, in fact, this can be really helpful in making the two of you a lot less nervous and anxious. However, there is a certain point that you reach when you know enough is enough. A drunk man is annoying as can be.

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Stress Is Ruining Your Relationship



Everyone feels stress on a daily basis. EVERYONE. Rather is internal or external. From the daily grind of work, bills, deadlines, to an unbalanced relationship. Stress is often the key source to ruining relationships. It has a toxic effect that often times takes the form of blame, impacts intimacy, or worst.

“Stress is an emotional and physiological response to thinking that an event, condition, or situation is [terrible] and that no good can come from [it],” says Dr. Mantell. The trick is to adopt more positive frameworks for difficult situations. Try to remind yourself that you’ll get through it, that there may even be a good reason a certain stressor has occurred—and at worst, it’s only one bad event.

The good news is if you can see signs, you can improve your relationship.

#1. Your Irritable 

If you perceive everything your partner says as a slight or get miffed extra easily, stress may be a factor. The longer stress lasts, the more likely we are to feel grumpy or argumentative and lash out.

Give yourself time to acknowledge the root cause of your stress and frustration. Avoid the immediate outburst. Prioritize and make a commitment to resolve the issues. For example, if it is stress from work, make a rule to limit the conversations about work at home.

#2 She Can Be The Victim Not Problem

When we’re chronically stressed, we’re more likely to perceive even the best relationship in a negative light. We’re also unlikely to realize that stress is factoring into that perception. Placing the blame solely on her is draining and simply unfair. Sometimes he or she will be too overworked to help you as effectively as you’d like, and vice versa.

If you really care about her ask for help. Don’t try to solve every damn problem in one day. Set goals together on what you both want to accomplish.

#3 Not Enough Time

If you can devote hours of your day watching videos and working for some company. Then you gave yourself time. Time is the biggest causes of stress in the relationship. She wants more, you want more time. You want to do what you want and she wants to do something else.

Compromise for mutual time and be in the moment. That doesn’t mean go out with her and stay on your phone. Be in the moment. Schedule time to relax together and set rules that are acceptable to both parties.

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